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Love for oneself

Felipe Zamorano

For love to exist, most of us believe that certain things must occur.

When you love someone, be it a parent, a friend or a romantic partner, you decide to embrace their faults, those little things that you might otherwise hate. The good qualities your partner possesses greatly surpass what you don’t like about him or her.

Loving someone means looking beyond what the rest of the world sees in that person. It means being absolutely comfortable with that person; simply being by their side in silence is more than enough.

You are willing to protect the person you love from any harm. You will prevent anything that may harm them, physical or emotional, from ever reaching them.

Whatever preconceived notions you have of love, they always involve some other person.

Many of us see love as something you give and receive. For love to exist there must be at least two people involved, right?

Someone is to be the object of our affection and we are to be the object of someone else’s affection.

“But–what if you just leave one person in the equation? What if everything that love involves occurred only within that individual?”

But what if you just leave one person in the equation? What if everything that love involves occurred only within that individual?

While many of us may be able to love, adore or revere someone else, some find it extremely difficult to feel that internally.

To some it might even seem impossible; we are, after all, our own worst critics.

As your own worst critic, you may believe you are not at the level you should be. You may believe you have failed to
meet the expectations the world had for you, and that you are simply mediocre.

While others may praise or even admire you for being who you are, it is difficult to always agree with them. You
may think of how you are still messing up, that they might just be lying.

It is difficult to avoid filling your mind with negative thoughts, thinking how you must change to be better, but not in a positive or constructive way.

You may see your faults and dislike yourself because of them. You may be afraid of being by yourself because you have no idea how to enjoy it. You may put yourself in harm’s way, associate yourself with the wrong people, or set yourself up to be hurt.

Being able to truly love someone, including ourselves, requires maturity, courage and in some cases sacrifice.

Just like you would with someone you love, you must accept your faults and recognize that perfection is impossible.

You must enjoy your own company. You must be able t o protect yourself from people and instances that may hurt you.

In the words o f novelistRoderick Thorpe, “We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.”

Love yourself and you will realize what love truly means.

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